Advice for parents and educators by C. G. Jung
C.G. Jung swiss psychoanalytician founded a psychoanalytic school which has links to
spiritualism and esoterism. He created the concept of archetype and collective unconscious.
Less known is that he implemented the mandala making process into psychotherapy.
Parents’ life are influencing kids
“Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk.” (C.G.Jung)
The impact that the parents make on kids are more like facts, than words, so it is obvious that the parents’ life coaching takes a big impression on the children.
Another basic thought of Jung: Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent. He thinks that even if the parents’ unlived life is untold and unconscious, many times it is covered with a white lie, even then children will grasp it. Jung gave a big task for parents, as he says that parents can save their kids from psychological traumas, if they openly take responsibility for their psychological difficulties. This is the best, and mentally healthiest example, what kids can copy for themselves.
The most important educational advice:
based on Jung’s idea, that „ …See kids what they really are, and not for someone, we would like to see, and in education follow the natural developmental lines and not for rules without life…” C.G.Jung
Educators’ self development is the basement of education for kids.
Jung suggests to all parents and educators to make an effort for inside consciousness and self-knowledge. He believes that all of these are conditions and possibilities of education at the same time, since the adult person’s self knowledge will help understand the young ones. In the field of education the ancient wisdom , that ’if you want to know the world first know yourself’ are more valid. As adults we would better to be aware of our insufficient educatedness and take effort to develop ourselves, our culture. If we stuck in developing our knowledge, then we can start to correct errors in the kids’ behaviour which we still have.
„In every adult there lurks a child- an eternal child- something, that is always becoming, is never completed, and calls for unceasing care, attention and education. That is the part of the personality, which wants to develop and becomes whole. (Jung)
Educating their “inner child” within will help parents develop their integrated adult self.
Common parental mistake
It is a big mistake to complete our unlived lives throughout our kids. If we do that, we make it impossible for them to live their own lives. Jung wrote that a personality can never flourish without choosing consciously moral decisions as walking on our own lifepath.
About educating difficult kids
„It is wisely advised that we need to deal with kids that are difficult to handle, even more so if we keep psychological knowledge for ourselves, because for these kids need simplicity first, and healthy human sense second.” C.G. Jung
These thoughts are worse to keep, before we, as parents and educators would over-complicate our problems in education.
It is a fact that kids are instinctively aware of bad personal traits of educators. If we can’t handle a certain kid, mostly the reason is that our unconscious problems – which is obvious for the kid- are in the way of the solutions. If we become aware of our buried reactions and hidden problems, then it will be more understandable what is lovable or unlovable in our behaviour for the child we are connected to.
That is why, if we pay attention to Jung’s words, we will not think any more , that in a certain educational situation there are parties: the spotless parent and the reluctant kid, a perfect educator and a child hard to handle. The truth is much more difficult and worth understanding in depth.
Source:C.G.Jung : Development of Personality. in :The Collected Works of C. G. Jung. Eds. Herbert Read, Michael Fordham, Gerhard Adler. Executive ed. W. McGuire. Trans R.F.C. Hull. London: Routledge Kegan Paul (1953–1980)